Healthy friendships bring us strength


By Trey Tompkins - Contributing Columnist



I think that our relationships with people around us build the most strength. I mostly enjoy the confluence between friends during friendship. What I mean by “confluence” is that both people or a group of people merge together with their unique qualities and begin, themselves, to expand and feel empowered about who they are. This can be done healthily, and also unhealthily.

Friendship with family, work or strangers can be unhealthy when one party becomes the entire or majority influence of the mutual arrangement. Maybe, at the beginning, two or more people had very good synergy, and there was strong confluence. Then quickly their bonding dissipated, yet people still agreed to sustain the arrangement; but not to grow stronger as individuals. This fabric of relationship building makes us weaker and deprives our energy.

A healthy friendship continues to build us, grow us, and make us shine or glow. All people are essential in these relationships, and nobody is placed in a system of order on it.

Then it becomes meaningful as we pick up on their habits and traits and enjoy this life of ours shared together. Having relationships in this sense gives us energy and makes us feel stronger.

I love working at a gym because it gives me a vast network of friendships with people who live in this community. For me, it’s the best way to get to know people who live around the area because everybody is coming in raw. There is a lot of pretense in our social environments and often I find that people are wearing “energy shields.” Those shields drain people because they are dense and prevent us from being loose or being ourselves.

The gym allows me to get a sense for who people are at an authentic level, which I love! That is real strength. I think this is available for anybody. Another great spot for this is on a hiking trail getting lost in the beauty of nature. We need to get lost from time to time to break up the monotony of being around each other so much. This is what keeps my energy fresh around other people, and allows for all of us to find contrast in life and between relationships.

We can’t build a world around the way that it shouldn’t be. We’ll just keep bringing it back that way. We can, however, start finding the enjoyment in what we do have. This will bring us ease. It happens with the focus on the people and relationships we do have. These blossom new connections and opportunities, and that is a way for anybody to get stronger.

Trey Tompkins is a local resident who writes fitness columns for the Record-Herald.

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By Trey Tompkins

Contributing Columnist